I’m a total amateur when it comes to music. I can’t play an instrument. I can’t carry a tune. I can’t even dance if it involves learning steps. But I do love music and one of the major losses that came with my deafness was music. Over the years, I’ve discovered some strategies and workarounds. I don’t actually hear music better, but the tricks make me think I do.
I was reminded of this when I went to see Paul Simon at Tanglewood early this summer. We have a turntable in our Berkshires house and lots of vinyl records, mostly from my husband’s and my youths. Paul Simon’s “Graceland” came out 40 years ago this summer and it’s still a favorite in our house no matter what the age group. It’s hard not to dance or least sway, especially to the music inspired by his work with musicians in South Africa. My 3-year-old granddaughter loves the title track, and so do I. In late June, her mother and I went to Tanglewood to hear Paul Simon.
Simon experienced a devastating hearing loss in 2023 when he was recording the album Seven Psalms. Eventually he began to talk about the emotional fallout from his loss and how he came to cope. He also worked with the Stanford Research Initiative on maximizing what hearing he still has. He is now 84, and his voice is not as strong and pure as it once was. But he can still perform, and he had a fabulous backup band. It was a huge, joyful experience, lots of dancing and swaying in the aisles and among the reportedly 15,000 people on the lawn. Lots of happy faces. Some ethereal moments. Here’s a review from the Brattleboro Reformer.
It took me a while to start enjoying the concert. There was no program or playlist and without knowing what he was playing, my hearing wouldn’t let me recognize even the most familiar songs. So at the beginning of each song, I turned to my daughter and asked her what he was singing. She typed the response on my phone (I can’t hear a whisper under the best circumstances). Once I knew what the song was, I could hear it. Nothing had changed in my ears, but my memory took over. The unidentifiable sound resolved into song, the incomprehensible words came flooding back. Without that indispensable cue, the name of the song, I’d have been completely at sea.
I also love classical music, and there too, the key to my enjoyment is the presence of a cue. That’s usually a visual component. One of the hardest things for me to follow is a symphony, especially if it’s recorded or over the radio. The various sounds meld together senselessly. Even if I know the piece, I can’t recognize it. Hearing it in a concert hall is a different and much more gratifying experience, because of visual aids. The conductor is key, and the more emotive the better. In a concert hall I’m able to see what section of the orchestra is playing, and more precisely which instruments are being played, prompting my memory of what a violin or a cello sounds like. The musicians’ body movements, the bow across the strings, the pauses – these act as a guide to what I’m hearing. When the whole orchestra is playing, the conductor’s gestures allow me to identify the sources and intensity of individual sections. If there’s a chorus, it too is a visual element. The soloists’ voices are clear because I can see who is singing. Add supertitles or a readable libretto and I’m in hearing heaven.
Opera combines all these elements, including the performers’ posture and gestures, facial expressions – and most opera houses have subtitles. Even if the singing is in a language I don’t know, the English subtitles allow me understand what’s happening on stage. If the opera is sung in English, the subtitles sometimes even allow me to hear the words – or at least my brain thinks I do.
These days I prefer new music. Operas I know well sound distorted. The Met Opera Live in HD broadcasts are great for someone with hearing loss because the camera focusses on the singers. I’m hearing via vision, assessing intensity and loudness, the conductor’s expression of the music through the body and the baton, and of course production values – set, costumes, acting. Sure, I’d love to go back to the old days of hearing a thrilling Verdi duet, but that’s not going to happen. Instead, I have remembered music, and the immersive experience of being in a live audience, in the sounds that I do hear. That might be too frustrating to sophisticated music lovers, but it’s enough for me.
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For more about living with hearing loss, read my memoir Shouting Won’t Help, and for more practical advice try Smart Hearing. Both are available as Kindle or paperback.
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As a hearing person, I found this really fascinating! Also, I realized that when I go to the opera, even in English, I do need the subtitles to “hear” the singing under the orchestra. And when I go to concerts, I also find that when I can see the instruments from the audience, it serves as an aid to hearing and appreciating the music.
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That’s interesting, but I guess it shouldn’t be surprising. We probably use all our senses (if they all work) for most things.
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I love this piece, Katherine. It’s so inspiring how you manage to find ways of still appreciating music. What energy. What imagination.
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Thanks. It’s interesting to read in the comments how many others continue to enjoy music, or at least a version of it.
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I won’t go into detail about my musical journey except to say that I am not a professional musician, but I learned to sight read as a teenager and sang in some professional choruses for over half my life before gradually losing my hearing. I am now profoundly deaf, but after a year or so of not being able to discern musical pitch, I am taking singing lessons.
Music memory is a great gift.
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That’s great about the singing lessons. Are they specifically to teach you how to sing on pitch with your hearing loss? Thanks for commenting.
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I have two music teachers plus a singing group, all online. My ability to sing on pitch has improved over the past year. Some of my earliest memories of music were of songs my mother sang from the 20s and 30s, her childhood and teenage years. Many of them became jazz standards. Although my earliest musical training was mostly classical, my current repertoire is mostly songs from that era. I find seeing sheet music a helpful way to know a tune, even some less familiar ones. I am inspired by people like Mandy Harvey, deafened as a teenager, who has learned to use vibrations to “hear” and perform professionally.
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Love this! We both experienced the joy of seeing Paul Simon with our daughters. For me, it was at Red Rocks in Denver, a most beautiful outdoor space. I agree, although his voice was not as strong, the concert was hugely enjoyable.
My only regret is not watching his documentary (below) beforehand. It would have made Seven Psalms even more meaningful. Watch when you can and let’s discuss afterwards, Holly
To stream In Restless Dreams: The Music of Paul Simon, you can watch it on MGM+ or The Roku Channel. Alternatively, you can purchase or rent individual episodes or the full two-part documentary on platforms like Amazon Prime Video https://www.amazon.com/Restless-Dreams-Music-Simon-Season/dp/B0CW29T38G or the Apple TV Store https://tv.apple.com/us/show/in-restless-dreams-the-music-of-paul-simon/umc.cmc.2sk9lmb0psuz65jgn5hsf73bm . [1 https://www.justwatch.com/us/tv-show/in-restless-dreams-the-music-of-paul-simon , 2 https://www.roku.com/whats-on/tv-shows/in-restless-dreams-the-music-of-paul-simon?id=6ea922853a9b503283b621540d86e360&srsltid=AfmBOoqHxi3G9Y_mw_Eu72ZWzZpN1oasoC5vFkvMolSqZjNWhYjtQTek , 3 https://www.amazon.com/Restless-Dreams-Music-Simon-Season/dp/B0CW29T38G, 4 https://tv.apple.com/us/show/in-restless-dreams-the-music-of-paul-simon/umc.cmc.2sk9lmb0psuz65jgn5hsf73bm , 5 https://www.justwatch.com/uk/movie/in-restless-dreams-the-music-of-paul-simon ] From my iPhone.
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Aren’t we lucky to have daughters! And thanks for the documentary link. I haven’t seen it and will asap.
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Thanks for sharing this. I too need to be told what a song is and then I can follow the words and tune. Funny how the brain works.
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Having hearing loss really does make you realize the brain’s role.
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Katherine,This is a fabulous piece! I learned so much — it should be published in a mainstream magazine, to be appreciated by both hearing and non-hearing audiences. . .
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Thank you! What a nice compliment.
It’s interesting to read the comments and see how many others also need extra info to recognize a piece of music — song title, subtitles etc.
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I’ve had hearing loss my whole life but didn’t get hearing aids until my early twenties. Now with Bluetooth streaming and the lyrics most songs have on Spotify, I’m relistening to the bands I grew up with in the 80s. There are so many lyrics I had entirely wrong!
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Apple Music/Podcasts also has lyrics. and I love understanding what’s being said/sung. Because we have vinyl records still, I also have the advantage of liner notes for older music. That’s one thing we lost with tapes and the CDs. My 30-something kids love vinyl, so I just read along.
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Exact same expierience. I need to know the song title to recognize and appreciate the music. And likewise, moving around in a multilingual environment, I need to be told the language (in difficult hearing situatioms) to tune in the brain on what to expect.
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So interesting about languages. I can’t understand most of them, but as you point out, once I know it’s German, say, it makes more sense. Thanks for this comment.
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